The Battle of Decibels at the Local Starbucks

Quite the range of emotion at the local Starbucks this morning. On the one hand, there was the man who, having strolled back from the bathroom, snatched his carefully wrapped breakfast sandwich off the counter, and shouted, "Is this mine?" When no one answered, he tossed his hands in the air. "Well, it doesn't have my name on it, but I guess it is!" At that point, even if it wasn't his, I doubt anyone would have claimed it; it had been crushed by his pounding fist.

Then, flailing his arms all the way to his seat, huffing and grunting at around one-hundred-twenty-five decibels (at or around the area where ear-pain begins)--just in case someone was unsure how he was feeling--he slammed his sandwich down on the table, growled, and methodically wiped the table with his bare hand, making sure everyone noticed that his table was dirty.

On the other hand, we have the whistler; the man who, in a burst of enthusiasm, whistled at around one-hundred-twenty-six decibels (just enough to outshine the grouch). And what a snap-of-the-head, drilling glare did the whistler get from the man with the breakfast sandwich stuffed in his quibbling mouth. It was a snarl that, if eyes tossed thunderbolts, could rip the whistler in half, starting at the seat of his pants, and mince him into cat food.

Yet, the whistler whistled on, only increasing in intensity when he caught wind of the sandwich man's bared teeth--his sandwich crumbling out the corners of his mouth because it was too dry to produce drool. He whistled "Don't Worry, Be happy," which got the sandwich man's eyes rolling. He whistled "Patience," which got the sandwich man's fist pounding. But as soon as he began whistling "Good Life," the sandwich man stood up, slammed his fist on the table, and drilling his eyeballs into the whistler's third eye--which provides a good poking from a distance, 'cause I'm certain he didn't want a lawsuit--flung his full beverage in the trash, so it CRASH!-ed into the can at full force! As if we care that he wasted his money on the five-dollar-beverage he's not going to drink. Yet, he made certain everyone was watching, as he made for the door, bickering about how he can't get any peace-and-quiet.

And so, the whistler, having won the battle of decibels, sat down by the window with his hot tea in one hand and a smirk on his face, to enjoy his daisy-filled, serene, whistling-of-a-day.

And that is where I took my leave with my own cup of coffee in my hand, feeling a bit gratified, because for my five bucks, not only did I get my triple venti soy latte, but I got to watch a superb battle go down, all on a grey Tuesday morning.


And... In honor of The Whistler, here is:

One Republic--"Good Life"

The Ninja Vs. The Evil Veggies!

Bet y'all thought I'd escaped from this asylum we call Earth, huh? Well... I did go on a journey, but sadly not to Mars, or Jupiter, or any other estranged planet. No, just across the sprawling unknown of the home we call the U.S. of A. Yes, I ventured forth on my horse (a flying horse, made of tin, believe it or not), out of the wild and wooly west, through the porthole of time (I did lose three hours, after all), and into a chaotic place called New England, where I had "jimmies" (those little sprinkles on ice cream, yeah... apparently they belong to Jimmy).

Having had one adventure after another (no, I don't think I'll tell ya about it at this time), I caught a nasty flu bug from the buggers on the subways in that dirty place called New York City, who kept sneezing on me, and had to ride my horse home again with a box of Kleenex in one hand and a bag of throat lozenges in the other. Thank goodness my horse knew the way, because I couldn't have navigated for the life of me. Why, I could have been lost for the rest of my life!

So, here I sit, two weeks later (including the three hours I gained back), with a new outlook on my diet. I learned how to drink and eat my fruits and veggies while I was away. You see... there exists such a thing as a blender! Bet you've never heard of one of those, have you? Yah, I thought not. You have to travel far and wide to learn about those nifty little thingies. But see... that is where you're lucky. For I--me--Caroline Adele O'Brien, have done the traveling for you (And no... you didn't miss anything). All you have to do is read on, my friend.

So this, here:

is called the blender!

Yes, it's actually a Ninja! It fights your fruits and veggies with its spinning blades, you see, and then leaves them all to be nuthin' but pulp. But here are some nifty things I've made using my blender:

Lemon-herb marinade

Fresh Mango Salsa

Gazpacho 

And the fun has only begun! So stay tuned for more tales of The Ninja vs. the Evil Veggies!

Stuck!

Stuck!

Humbledee, dumbledee.
I'm in my orchard tree.
Knocked down the ladder, see?
I can't get down!

Everyday I have prayed,
"Oh-pleaseLord-Oh-pleaseLord,
Let someone find me, 'fore
I bust my crown!"

~by Caroline Adele O'Brien

Caroline Says No To Caffeine!

Don't be surprised if I surprise you with nonsense today. I'm a bit off kilter. You see, I've not had my caffeine for a full twenty-four hours, and anyone who knows me, knows... Caroline can't live without her coffee. Well...

I'm a terrible insomniac. I can't ever sleep a full night. Lately, I've fallen pray to the never ending cycle of: not enough sleep + more caffeine + even less sleep + even more caffeine... which eventually, continued on a spectrum of night after day after night, finally = Caroline gives up on coffee!

I've replaced it with fresh-squeezed fruit juice, hoping that the vitamins and minerals help to wake me up, rather than using caffeine. And, I have to say, day 2 of these lovely juice beverages, and I'm actually feeling almost as alert as I did with caffeine. The headaches have lessened, and best of all... I ACTUALLY SLEPT LAST NIGHT! So I don't know if it's the vitamins that are helping me to feel more awake, or if it's the lack of caffeine that led to a good night's sleep that made me feel this way. But whatever it is, I love it! And I have to say, it's nice to wake up to fresh squeezed juice in the morning.

Here's what I had:

7 carrots
2 red peppers
2 oranges
1 grapefruit
1/2 lemon

I ran it all through the juicer, and "Woop, Woop!" Here it is:

A beautiful, sunrise beverage to wake up with! And it's oh, so good--for you ;) haha! It seriously was one of the best things I've ever tasted! I know it sounds weird to put red pepper in with it, but it gives it a perfectly blended flavor; not too sweet, not too bitter. I want these EVERY morning!!

So yes, it's a new passion of mine, blending these fruity-veggie cocktails. You'll probably be hearing more about it, as time goes on and I discover other recipes. The one I had last night was really good too, with:

1 handfull of Spinach

5 Kale leaves

3 celery sticks

1/2 a lemon

1 cucumber

2 apples

1 handfull cilantro

1" fresh ginger

Very healthy, and after the initial grassy taste, the apple came out and WHAM! I was in love with this one too.

Meeshtar's Adventures in the Meowse House (A Ballade)

Meeshtar's Adventures in the Meowse House (A Ballade)

All in a lazy summer afternoon,
Meeshtar curled 'neath the ottoman to snore,
And as he drifted in a dream's cocoon,
A turbaned Meowse slinked along the wood floor.
The Meowse grazed Meeshtar's whiskers, and dashed for
His house. Meeshtar scampered after, and SMACK!
Into the cupboard, his poor face did bore.
Yet, Meeshtar swore, that Meowse he would attack!

Was it the food, or perhaps the full moon,
That helped him fit inside the Meowse's door?
You see, he ate, then shriveled like a prune.
He rubbed his paws and entered 'neath the drawer.
His new Meowse size, he truly did adore.
Soon as his eyes adjusted to the black,
He found a whole new planet to explore.
Yet, Meeshtar swore, that Meowse he would attack!

On Planet Meowse, he entered a saloon.
A one-octopus-band played a jazz score,
While Meeshtar fought a break-dancing baboon.
It was an all-out cat and baboon war!
But Meeshtar won, and galloped to the shore,
Upon that nasty baboon's swooping back.
Locked in the Meowse trials, Meeshtar grew sore.
Yet, Meeshtar swore, that Meowse he would attack!

As Meeshtar won the trials of Meowse lore,
He morphed slowly into a Meowse, and "Ack!"
His teeth fell out, he lost his fur, and more!
Yet, Meeshtar swore, that Meowse he would attack!

The Battlements! (A Villanelle Poem)

The Battlement

Echoes through the canyon linger.
He twists his foot in the sand.
Those last words must really sting her.

She gapes at his accusing finger.
She'd had her outrageous lies planned.
Echoes through the canyon linger.

"You belong on Jerry Springer!"
She wailed. Her tearing eyes, she fanned.
Those last words must really sting her.

He readied up another zinger.
"God, I hope your songs get banned!"
Echoes through the canyon linger.

It must have been a dead-ringer.
She stumbled on the shifting land.
Those last words must really sting her.

But he'd always liked this folk-singer,
And so he reached out for her hand.
Echoes through the canyon linger.
Those last words must really sting her.


-by Caroline Adele O'Brien

Echoes In Tension

Echoes In Tension

The sandwich is kosher.
That's all she cares about.
As their rowboat cruises
The fjord, the echoes
Exalt his excuses.

The sandwich is kosher.
But why should she care now?
She wishes the river
would swallow her alive.
His voice makes her shiver.

"The sandwich is kosher."
That's what she tells herself.
His roguish eyes glisten.
The water cries to her,
Pleading, "Please, don't listen."

The sandwich is kosher.
She tosses it aside,
As her stomach tumbles--
Salt over ham on rye--
And her fortress crumbles.


-by Caroline Adele O'Brien





*For clarification purposes (because I know ham is not kosher, ha ha ha!), the definition of "kosher" for the sake of this poem is the slang definition, as in: "it's cool," or, "it's okay." Basically, she's saying, "This sandwich is okay, even if the jerk in the boat is not." :) But please, interpret it how you like, because to me, a good and deep poem sparks debate. I always try to leave open questions.